The Recipe For Happiness
Hey, it’s been absolute insanity in my life since last I posted, but, starting this weekend, (after I’m done with my art show) I’ll be back to something resembling a normal schedule.
I really wish I had kept up with this during that time, though. I think it could have helped me. I need to get better with that.
Anyway, despite my lack of posting here, I have found myself in a genuinely happy mood. I think I may have even found the recipe for my own happiness! Here it is:
- Make sure I spend more time working in my art studio then tending bar.
- Painting more things I really want to paint than commissioned pieces.
- Cutting my alcohol consumption in half (this was probably an obvious one).
- Cutting the women I’m currently flirting and/or fooling around with down to 2. 3 tops. (Again, another obvious one.)
- Doubling my caffeine intake (replacing one type of self-medication with another! Yay!!!)
Honestly, while I think a good portion if that is true, I think this good mood is just the bounce back I typically feel after getting mired in a depression for awhile. And, parts of March got pretty dark.
Ultimately, I think I just need to keep doing the work. I need to find something to post here everyday. Even if I’m just faking it.
Hey, kids! I have not abandoned this blog, or the whole positive thinking experiment. I’ve been super busy working my day job, catching up on bills, and prepping for an upcoming art house. I do have some interesting things to write about, a couple of cool things I’ve cone across, and some updates on my own progress, and mental health. All very cool and very exciting, and I look forward to sharing it with you as soon as I murder all these dastardly interlopers clogging up my to-do list.
Slow Down, You Move Too Fast…
One of the many things I have been blessed with is a highly active brain, that, when running at peak efficiency, is a lot like a bee hive. There’s a whole lot going on in there, but every moving part is doing it’s job, being productive, and working toward a common goal.
But, when my bi-polar li’l noggin starts sliding towards the manic end of the scale, it’s like someone drop-kicked that behave and now all hell has broken lose. There’s a whirlwind of activity, but nobody knows what to and nothing is getting accomplished.
When I have a whole lot on my plate, as I do now, it’s always easy for me to get overwhelmed by the sheer volume of what I need to do. I’ll sit for hours debating what to do first, and consequently, get nothing done.
This is unacceptable, and acts as a constant hindrance to me achieving any sort of success in my life. So, I’ve decided to start making to-do lists. Daily to-do lists. HIGHLY detailed daily to-do lists. I’m going to start planning every inch of my day down to when I shower and even when I jerk off (hey, this is a blog about maintaining a certain level of happiness, some things are just plain necessary).
Each day goals will be set, and I will not be allowed to move on to the next thing until the last goal is met. Hopefully, after a few weeks, this will just become habit. That’s what this is about, training my brain to start thinking and behaving differently.
We need to reign those fucking bees in. You saw what they did to Nic Cage in Wicker Man.
Day 11 - Making Progress
As we end the 2nd week of this experiment I’ve already started to notice some changes in my general demeanor (the Giants winning the Super Bowl certainly helped with that, as well). In the few circumstances where I’ve found myself getting unnecessarily angry, stressed, or depressed, I was able to slow down, take a deep breath, and rationalize my way out of it. I’ve also been getting more disciplined as far as getting into a steady work routine, spending less money, and getting back into shape are concerned. It’s amazing how much just exercising again and getting some decent nights’ sleep can improve one’s mood.
The next few weeks will be the real test, though. I’ve got so much to prepare for, I have audition spots at a few comedy clubs in New York, I’m in the March Madness comedy tournament at The Stress Factory here in Jersey, and I have til April 6th to finish about a dozen pieces for my next art show. I’m also hoping to have caught up on my bills and paid off a few debts by then.
Needless to say, it’s going to take a clear head and a lot of discipline to accomplish all this. If I can get through it all without succumbing to the stress and pressure by April, and going on a nice li’l bender to close out March, then I’ll know I’ve truly accomplished something and that this shit might actually work. Until, then DEEP breaths.
In the meantime, I want to thank everyone for all the positive feedback on this thing. It was a little nerve-wracking throwing this out there, but I appreciate the love, kids. I even got a nice e-mail from the ex-wife who, as you could imagine, I have had a rather frosty relationship with the last 2 1/2 years. It managed to both crack me up and warm my heart. The Positive Thinking Experiment: mending fences and building bridges! Who knew?
I’ll leave you with the money quote from that e-mail:
“So I started reading thinking, “Great. Now everyone will know my ex-husband is a lunatic”. But I am totally impressed. You sound (dot, dot, dot) mature. It’s not your usual bullshit. Your writing skills paired with honesty is fantastic. Refreshing. I think this has super potential for you personally and the masses. I found myself wanting to read the next sentence instead of rolling my eyes at the latest, overly-witty, sarcastic, self-deprecating, etc, etc…….”
Great stuff, huh? Now you all know I’m a lunatic. Enjoy your weekend, everyone.